Shall all the expenses of funeral, condolences house, coffee and food be paid from the inheritance of the dead?

Answer

Praise Be to Allah and Peace Be Upon His Messenger.

Referring to your question, whatever is served in the house of condolences such as foods, coffee, or water is not considered as a commitment that should be paid from the inheritance as if it were a debt. In fact, what is served in these houses is divided into two parts: the first part such as foods or desserts is undesirable or it could even be considered haram as it is contradicts with death. It is a sorrowful occasion; it is not a pleasing one to invite people to eat. However, the second part, which is serving coffee and water is considered allowed as it has become a tradition, and it does not contradict with the occasion. If the family of the dead wants to serve water and coffee, they can do that and should pay for it from their own money. If all family members agree to pay from the inheritance, they can as long as there are no children amongst them because children are not mature enough to decide whether to pay or not, and none can decide instead of them.  

Shaikh Muhammad Ahmad Hussain, the General Mufti (Muslim Legal Scholar), in the Palestinian Legal Verdict Council was once asked if serving dates in the houses of condolences can be considered as charity or not, and he said:

“The rule of origin of things is permissibility.” What is served in the houses of condolences such as coffee, water, or dates has become a common tradition in our communities. It does not contradict with religion. However, it is considered as a form of thanking to those who come to offer condolences, but serving coffee, water, or dates should not form financial burden on the family of the dead.  

Regarding considering serving dates as charity, the charity indeed is given only to the poor. It should not be given to any rich people. The prophet (PBUH) said: “It is not permissible to give charity to a rich man or to one who is strong and healthy.” Sunan Abu Dawood

Thus, serving dates, in addition to coffee and water is allowed provided that it does not form a financial burden, and it is not a part of funeral’s expenses.

Related to this, the Verdict Council issued on 31/10/2013 in rule No. 16/2013/231, decision No. 1/110 which states that it is undesirable to serve foods from the family of the dead to visitors as it contradicts with Sunnah, and it is a tradition that has been recently created. It is considered like wailing which is prevented by religion. Jarir Ibn Abdullah Al-Bajali said: “We used to consider that gathering with the family of the deceased and preparing food as a form of wailing.” Sunan Ibn Majah.

What is related to Sunnah is preparing foods to the family of the deceased by others to help and support them, the prophet (PBUH) asked his companions to do that when he was informed that Ja’far Ibn Abi Taleb had been killed. He said: “Prepare food for the family of Ja’far for there came upon them an incident which has engaged them.” Sunan Abu Dawood

Therefore, the Verdict Council thinks that there is no harm to open houses of condolences, but without serving food especially if its expenses will be paid from the inheritance. If they want to offer charity, they can pay it to the poor later.